A Graduate's Advice- Books I'm reading

This post is a little different from the usual advice I give on a Sunday. However, as I'm an English graduate the one thing I've learnt the hard way is how to come down from the pressured reading of having to read a certain few books every week I can now relax and get through some of the one's I've been wanting to read (or re-read) since I'm graduating. So I thought I'd put this to the test, to find a couple of books with inspiration on how I want to lead my life come September. I found five, some I've read, some I'm reading and some are on the waiting list but all of them give advice and I find can apply to what's going to happen in the future. Also as a side note, I was an English student, expect this to get a little bit analytical.

The Bildungsroman

I wrote on this novel for my dissertation. I focused on sexuality and relationships in the American bildungsroman with a particular focus on novels from the Generation X era. Exciting! However, I loved this book because the protagonist Art grows substantially throughout the entirety of the novel and in the end lives for himself and makes his own decisions as to what will make him happy, not his father. I can't say much without giving the plot away but I can conclude that for a book about bisexuality, gangsters, petulance and figuring yourself out Chabon teaches the lesson of individual autonomy and that's important in taking the next step now I'm graduating. 


The Funny Lady

This may have a place on this list because I've been marathoning Parks and Recreation since summer started but they is no denying it, Amy Poehler is hilarious and her book is the same. Giving incredible advice while making me cry tears of laughter she had to be on the list. It isn't coherent, it's considered a 'non-book' by publishers but it is so relatable. From her early career, to anecdotes on working with Tina Fey and Nick Offerman (please adopt me) this book does sway into the territory of self help. With quotes such as “It takes years as a woman to unlearn what you have been taught to be sorry for. It takes years to find your voice and seize your real estate," it offers some great advice and deserves to be on this list.

The Classic

Ever since visiting the Bronte museum last summer in Haworth I've read more of my fair share of Bronte's work. Though I'm more a fan of Emily because of her underdog status (their poor brother didn't get a look in) and Wuthering Heights, there's no doubt that Charlotte's work Jane Eyre is deserving of this list. Again its another novel of girls doing it for themselves so give it read, even if it's just for bragging rights.


The Career Inspo

I know this was in a recent EBay wishlist but i couldn't help put in on once again because it is such an inspirational story. The quote “There are secret opportunities hidden inside every failure.” hits quite close to home and is one I'll carry through the interview process. I didn't get into my university of choice and ended up on the North Coast as a result. I cried so hard the day of my results but I wouldn't change it for the world. That failure led to the three greatest years of my life. I studied something I love in a way that suited me, met my boyfriend, met amazing friends and learned how to live on my own. If the advice is as solid as this throughout the novel then its worth a spot here. 


The Short Story Collection

I first found Annie Proulx in the October of my first year of university. I had no idea who she was, didn't know of her fame and tentatively read The Shipping News and found my first love. I delved into her collections, wrote on her every year in some way (2nd year on Brokeback Mountain, 3rd on Close Range) and have held her in my reading repertoire ever since. It is why I want to revisit Close Range because it has so many lessons for somebody, especially of my age. In particular, the story of The Half-Skinned Steer through her retelling of the Icelandic folk tale Porgeir's Bull, not only does she evoke the overpowering landscape of her regional Wyoming but importantly, she teaches dedication to in her case the rough wilderness of ranching but it is a lesson that can be carried when someone approaches the read world as I have done. To dedicate yourself fully to whatever you want to do and that's why it made this list. 

A Grad's Advice- Cooking

When I was (*tear*) a student I spent my first year at home so I never really got the experience of living alone until second year. I went in older and wiser to my student halls thinking I’d be the sagely older student who could give advice about what to expect. This didn’t happen for various reasons that I won’t go into but one of my downfalls was cooking. Prior to moving out I didn’t cook, I could do the basics and when I attempted more complex stuff some random slip up would mess it up (I accidentally put the blade protectors from the food processor into a cake on mother’s day) so when I had to cook for myself it was daunting. Having grilled a pizza one too many times by third year I decided living on pasta would no longer suffice and kicked things up  a gear and by now I’m pretty damn good if I say so myself. So here’s a couple of tips on how to begin to cook when you’re out on your own for the first time.

Get a cook book

I know you can look it up on the internet or can find your recipes on Pinterest but I like having a hard copy of a book in front of me especially in cooking (I don’t want oil or sauce on my phone). Getting one targeted at students is even better. I used Nosh for Students by Joy May and it is full of simple and easy recipes which serves more than one so you have leftovers for the next day. Its cheap, its easy, it measures everything is mugs or spoons so you don't need scales and it is a good basis for the simple recipes that are staples to surviving halls. 

Fill your cupboard

And not with pot noodles. There are several things that should be kept in a cupboard in case of emergency. For me it was herbs and spices (nothing too fancy), chopped tomatoes, sauces like tomato and BBQ, stock cubes, rice, pasta, beans (baked and cannellini) UTH milk, sugar, flour, oil, pasta sauce and cereal. The versatility of these items makes them key to cooking because everything can be used to make a meal. Beans, chopped tomatoes, add an egg and maybe some sausages or pancetta and you have breakfast for dinner but baked in the oven. It’s simple and if it’s been an awful day you can’t go wrong with pasta, its 29p for penne in Tesco.

Get the basics down

Learn how to wield a decent knife, how long to cook things, learn how to fix a problem if you accidentally add too much spice. Google this, use youtube tutorials, use your cookbook for advice, it is very easy to learn the basics. By having the knowledge behind the actual cooking when it comes to the actual cooking just follow the recipe and you’ll do fine.

Love your freezer

Leftovers are amazing and it’s something I learned only recently when some freezer space became available. Having leftover pasta sauce/stew/curry whatever, in the freezer which you can throw in a pot and serve is an actual godsend when its chucking it down, you’ve had a crappy day and just want a hug. By prepping bigger batches of food than need in advance it is the past you giving future you a hug and makes life so much easier.

Have a go

It’s much easier to balls up a cake than a curry. Everybody thinks they can bake but cooking is ten times easier so put down the sieve and grab the big pot and sauté something. If you don’t give it a go then you’re going to be living off pasta. Follow the recipe add a bit of your own spin and it’ll be alright. Just make sure things are in date and defrosted. You’ve seen nothing until you’ve seen your roommate try and separate two frozen burgers with a spatula while cooking them in a frying pan. Just use your wits and read the instructions and you’ll be grand.

5 Things I'd Tell My Teenage Self

Look at how good the camera is on my new phone!

I know this is slightly different from the normal Friday EBay post but so much has been going on with work and getting my sister moved out and my dog going to the vets I really haven't had time for the blog. However, I'm on a late shift at work so had the morning to do some stuff. So I thought I'd use Friday's post to get a little bit reflective. I'm graduating in 5 days and I've come a long way since then. I've faced bullying, fall outs, self-esteem issues but I feel like I've overcome them and am ready for the next chapter of my life. I have some advice for myself and for anybody who is younger. Retrospect is a wonderful thing and I wish I took this. So for the five days before I'm graduating here's five bits of advice I'd give my teenage self.

Throw Yourself Into Things

I never really got involved in a lot of things as I got older and I really wish I did. I suppose it was because I was afraid of failing. I regret not joining more clubs inside and outside of school and many opportunities had passed me by, especially in writing for certain publications. Whenever I did get involved with something I found myself never fully committing. I was lazy, I made excuses and really i shied away from responsibility. I wish I really involved myself better and became an integral part of things but due to self-esteem and fear of rocking the boat that never happened. Now I'm not afraid to do that, I take on extra responsibility whenever I can but for many years I found it difficult. However, what helped was my R.E ethics class. I'm not religious but the ethical debates of R.E really drew me in and I was one of the top students, getting a prize for the highest score at A.S level (pipped to the post at A-Level). It allowed me to showcase my opinions when the majority of the class was opposed to what I thought and it was amazing to be able to have the confidence to approach these matters without fear of retribution. It helped that I had an amazing teacher who loved me for my opinions and how structured they were but it was this class that I began to understand that throwing myself into things had it's benefits and it helped me to throw myself into things at university and beyond.


Don't be Afraid to Fail

One of my greatest fears as a teenager was failing. Failing at friendships, at exams, at having the wrong opinion, this scared me like no other. It wasn't a pressure that my mum put on me, she just wanted what was best but I put it on myself. It all came to a head when the day I got my results and found out I hadn't the grades to get into Queens and had to go the Ulster on the North Coast. I was heartbroken and I cried, hard. However, I wouldn't change that moment for the world. Coleraine has changed me. It has matured me, I've made great friends, I've learnt how to be an actual adult and take on everything head on, even failure. So to be graduating from it is an honour because without it I wouldn't be the person I am today with a clearer set of goals of where I want to be in life.

Fuck what people think
As most teenagers I cared too much about what other people thought of me. I was quiet and tried to blend in because I didn't want to make a scene especially after being bullied for years. However, I really should have stood up for what I believed in and for what I liked because it made me me. I tried to hard to impress people, changed who I was to fit in when I really should have done what I wanted. Now I have a close knit group of friends who I wouldn't change for the world and who love all of my quirks. I shouldn't have got hung up because there's no point. Not everybody is going to like you but some people will and I should have stuck with those people.

Cry Less and appreciate what you have
I spent a lot of my teenage years crying because I went through a lot. From divorce, bullying, losing a whole friendship group because of one girl lying about me in year 10 it was rough for me. However, I really should have seen the silver lining in all of these events and turned it into a positive, something I've learned to do now. Without the divorce I wouldn't be who I am today, my confidence would have been completely stifled by my father and god knows if I would have gotten any of the experiences my mum gave me. I'm better off without that toxic group of friends. And having this happen to me in a very short space of time proves just how strong an individual I truly am and that's an awesome thing to know. 

Don't drink that bottle of Southern Comfort, it ruins the drink for you.
This one is pretty clear. I got wasted one night at a friend's house part drinking nearly 2 litres of Southern Comfort and Sprite in the process. Understandably that was one of the worst hangovers I've ever had. Its been five years and I still can't drink it and that hurts because it was really tasty, not that I'm a big drinker anymore.

A Grad's Advice- Budgeting

It wasn’t until my third year in university where I got the kick up the arse I needed, was working more hours when I travelled up to Belfast and decided I was going to make my money stretch and ignore the need for mom jeans. Northern Ireland isn’t an expensive place. My rent for a gorgeous house with sea views (and I  got the ensuite room for being the only girl) was only £200 a month with BT broadband and tv thrown in. This is a bargain because the house was beautiful and spacious and it broke my heart to leave it. Anyway, because of this my income was bigger even though my loan was tiny and I gave budgeting a go in order to save some money up for Leeds which leads (ha!) on to my first point…

Budget with a goal in mind

If it wasn’t for my goal of moving at the end of this summer half of the budgeting I did would have went out the window and I would have an extensive wardrobe by now. This isn’t to say I didn’t have the odd sneaky dominos when I had a long day but by having a set time frame and understanding that I couldn’t impulse buy absolutely everything it meant I could put away extra money each month. Also, throw your spare change in a drawer and forget about it, you’ll be surprised how much you end up with when May rolls around. Focus on a holiday, a car, something you really want and hopefully that’ll give you the push to say no to the frivolous things.

Make a list

God a love a list. I get it from my uncle who was able to tell my mum where’d they’d be at 2pm on a Thursday on their trip to Toronto. Anyway, one of the first things to do when tackling your finances is to have an income section and expenditure section and lay out everything you pay for. Rent, food, electricity, Netflix, somethings gotta go and if you can’t give up Netflix maybe cool it on the nights out, it’ll save money and just play Kings with the cheap Tesco vodka, mixed with fruit juice and it’s just like a cocktail. Tell yourself that, it’ll make the pain a little less harsh. But seriously, get it all down on paper, try and make it as accurate as possible, transfer to Excel and figure out how you’re going to afford everything.

If it too hard, there’s an app for that

There are loads of apps that help with budgeting especially when at the start of university you’re just thrown in at the deep end with most likely an overdraft and the words ‘free money’ stuck in your head. Try OnTrees which links your bank accounts (safely obviously) and it keep your incomings and outgoings in one place. It also gives the option of creating a budget and it can monitor how well you stick to it. Or if you worry you spend too much money on ‘food’ (booze and pot noodles) try mySuperList. It allows you to virtually shop and then tallies the price, comparing between the big supermarkets and showing where has the best cashback and so on. It’s a bit boring but it gets the job done and even has all the up to date offers in each shop so you can’t really go wrong.

Use your student discount

It may seem like an obvious one to end on but you only have three or four years to use so damn well get the most out of it. For cinemas, to that jacket in River Island, to even some restaurants use it if you can’t resist. Also, apply for an NUS card. I didn’t and have so much regret. For £8 it’s worth it on what you can save and everywhere accepts it and can be used online unlike my shitty Ulster one. I don't hold a grudge, I promise. Also, because you’re a student check with your university if you can get free tech stuff. I got MacAfee and Microsoft office for free and I only found this out in my final year. Check it out it should be somewhere on your university space (ours was called portal but names change). 

A Graduate's Advice- Debt

I have debt. I’m the first to admit this. Not crippling university debt, I can live with my student loans it’s just the price of going to university nowadays. No, what I mean is that during my first year of university where I finally had money after years of living without expenses I may have made too many trips to Topshop and found myself having spent all of my overdraft. I spent that summer crying, desperately trying to find a job and having my mum supplement me. It was a really bad time and I still have that debt hanging over me. 

         

However, I learnt from it and without it, I know I wouldn’t be in the position I am today. Without taking that hard lesson, I probably wouldn’t have been able to fund my move to Leeds so heed my advice for the love of God Budget! So here are five tips on how to keep your money in check in uni so you don’t end up like me.

1.    Make a budget.

    There are loads of apps and tools online that can help with budgeting and it can even allow you to see places where you can cut down on some expenses. Skip your morning coffee, bring a packed lunch, borrow books from the library rather than buy everything on your reading lists, you don’t need them all! Also meal plan because once you do not only are you eating healthier, you’re also saving money and get amazing leftovers for lunch. It’s a win win.

2.    Don’t fall for loans/ credit cards/ payday loans

 Because they will mess you up and you’ll find yourself with debt up to your eyeballs. Its 'free' money when you're buying that dress in Zara but when you see what you owe and the interest added which is a gazillion percent you will weep. Just don’t.

3.    Talk to someone! 

  You have no idea how much release you can get from sharing your worries. Talk to your mum, your roommate, your friend, your dog, anybody that will listen. Only then, after your cry can you put a plan into action and understand where you went wrong and how to appease it.

4.    Consider getting a job. 

Without my job in care work I wouldn’t have been able to live at university, I probably wouldn’t have been able to afford much but because I’m a grafter and I put the hours in, it allowed me to live quite comfortably in my third year. There are loads of options and I know there’s the spiral of needing experience to get experience but it’s possibly, volunteer whilst you look and something should come up as it did for me!

5.  Talk to the uni. 

     If shit hits the fan, your university should have funds in place for students in dire straits. At Ulster, you had an interview and the university gave you a grant off £200 to keep you going when you only have £8 in your account until May. Use it! Don’t feel ashamed it’s put in place because students are dicks and will spend too much money on nights out. It’s a rite of passage, get the free money and use it to get back on your feet.

A Graduate's Advice- CVs

Ah the curriculum vitae, the dreaded foe of any graduate. So many questions. What font? What do I say? Only two pages? WTF? It is horrible and time consuming and then you have to tailor it to each job and you’re left wondering why employers won’t just give you a job because of your dazzling personality. However, it is one of the hurdles of a graduate or even younger when applying for part time jobs that just has to be done. I’ve read everything on the interwebs about what will make your CV stand out and here are just a couple of tips I’ve picked up along the way which will hopefully help, though I’m not expert.

1.    Font, sizing and margins.
One of the key things for the CV is readability. It’s the same thing you were always taught in school/uni about examiners, make it easy for them and you’ll no doubt get extra marks and I see the CV in a similar light. Make bold headings, use a readable font, make everything aligned and clean. It is common sense but having a flowing CV is the first step of not getting it thrown in the bin. What I use is put the margins in narrow, put the font in Verdana, put headings in size 14, my name in 18, and the general words in 10. It looks if I do say so myself, quite professional.

2.    Use buzz words.

Every time in careers class when the dreaded buzz words came up usually I tuned out but really opening your bullet point with words such as led, sold, developed, managed etc. really does sound better. Not only is it succinct which gives you more space to talk about your awesome self but some companies scan for these words so if your CVs littered with them then you’re more than likely to get the interview. This does NOT mean you cover your CV with white buzzwords, that’s not cool. However, do put them in everywhere you can, like liaised, I like that word, I’ll liaise with your dog if it looked good on my CV but just make sure it looks neat, succinct and paints you in your best light.

3.    Brag, brag, brag.

Don’t worry if you don’t have a job, brag about everything you do, you’re an awesome individual. My boyfriend has (as of time of writing) never had a job but he has a CV chock full of his experiences. All the silly things you put off such as that charity abseil all count at showing your dedication, your motivation, really anything. Work with your church put it in, in the case of my boyfriend it was his leadership at Scouts. Things you don’t think about are CV worthy. Just brag and make an impact on those two pages.